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Warring further still...

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Knowing that this season in my life is where it should be is probably easier to accept, than for me to accept the truths of what God Himself has spoken to me about the future. I will tell you that what I am walking through is difficult and hard, but what God has spoken to me is even harder. Not because it will be painful, although I am sure it will be at times, but because of the reality and gravity of what it is. I am in a season of prepping, I believe, in my life for the next season of living out what I know God has said. He has given me direction in many areas of my life and yet I am in this waiting game. Tonight I was reminded that as Jesus had the cross before Him, those hours in the garden right before were necessary. He needed to go and seek the face of His Father. He needed to go further still. (Matt. 26:38-39) He wrestled with the dread for the task He was about to undertake. I know that God isn't asking us to take on all the sins of the world for all the ages ever to be,

Great I am

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I heard this song at a service I went to tonight and I have to tell you that God moved on me. It is amazing. I encourage you that as you listen to this song, read the words. i have put the words up and they are on the video. Please listen to the entire song and ask God to speak to you. Ask Him to show you that He is the Great I Am! I know He will, just ask and believe He can show you.  Great I Am - New Life Worship "I wanna to be close close to your side   So heaven is real and death is a lie   I wanna hear voices of angels above   Singing as one   Hallelujah Holy Holy   God almighty Great I am   Who is worthy   None beside Thee   God Almighty   Great I Am   I wanna be near near to your heart   Loving the word hating the dark   I want to see dry bones living again   Singing as one   Chorus   Hallelujah   Holy Holy   God almighty Great I am   Who is worthy   None beside Thee   God Almighty   Great I Am   He's the Great I Am Great I Am   The mo

Ho'okuu Ha'alee

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I am an all or nothing kind of person. I don't think life should be lived only half way. You can either live life to the fullest or why bother at all. This tends to be a problem for me in certain areas like washing my car. I like it super clean, and why is it that only broken sprinklers that drench your car, show up when you just had it washed? Well if I washed my car, especially myself, and something gets on it, I freak out a bit. So instead I have found it easier to not wash it. I know it looks like I don't care or that I am lazy, but the reality is, that I freak out so much in my head, I just have to leave it alone. This is the case in most parts of my life. If something is clean and it gets messed up in the slightest I just leave it alone. Sometimes this even includes my walk with the Lord. Things will be going great and then BOOM, I fall with something I have said or done, and then I just leave it to get worse. These past few years I have tried to force myself to be proact

Feathers aren't just for flying

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Last night I was listening to my music before I went to sleep and I was sad because a song came on that reminded me of something that God is working on in my life and it stung. I will tell you that I cried a bit and then I turned my head to face the Lord. I know that His ways are higher than my ways, and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts. He moves and works outside of space and time. He is a creator, not a duplicator and He loves me enough to keep me struggling so I don't lose focus on the fight. Yet when we ask our Father to show us something to keep our hope and faith alive, He does it His own way and in His own time. Well I prayed and laid it all back on Christ before I went to sleep. This morning I woke up to a glimmer of hope in my current circumstance. He was confirming something to me and blessed me by whom this message came through. My friend in New Zealand, whom I love so much and miss her and her family terribly. She was used by God for ME!!! I was floored this m

Being the Light?

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Have you even really thought about what that statement means? What does it actually mean to be the light? Well I know we talk about that at church and teach children songs that tell them about it but really what does it mean. I have been thinking about what this means and what to share with you. I pray that what God has been showing me will help you wrestle with this question. Let's start with what light isn't and maybe that will help a little in this. If something is dark what does that mean? It just means that there is an absence of light. Some of the things I know light isn't is dark, it doesn't hide well, it doesn't leave a whole lot of room for doubt about how something looks, and it doesn't give way to fear. So with just these few thoughts I can venture to say that light exposes things for what they were. I remember being scared when I was little and I always wanted to sleep with the light on. Why? Because if I thought something was in my room in the lig

Practice of Pain

These days I am in a new position that I have not ever been in. God has me in this place I am sure for so many different reasons and yet I catch myself at times just trying to pass the time, instead of REALLY listening to God and learning what I need to for the season I am entering. I am sitting in a VERY quiet, sleeping house trying NOT to be alone, when I know that God wants me to be SOLEY reliant on Him. He has stripped me of close friendships that have distracted me, and he has has me up late at night like usual to be the ONLY one who has my full attention. This may seem like I am complaining, but in reality I am just stating facts about my current situation. I am honored to be in this place that He is truly jealous for me and yet believe me, I wouldn't wish the pain I have had to walk through these past months on anyone, unless it was for your good. I believe that God hasn't allowed any of this to happen in vein. I will share a bit of my heart that I can see be brought for

Adjustments

I know it has been a while since I have written but that is just because my life called for some major adjustments and I need a clear mind to write, so I took a bit of a break from writing. But now I am back and ready for this new year, atleast half of me is ready for this new year. The other half isn't quite sure still what day it is or what time it is. Adjusting to all these culture changes, weather changes, lifestyle changes, and emotional changes I have come to the conclusion that I am made to be in a place where the pressure of certain things just is non existent. For example, there is so much pressure in having the latest gadget and having the newest toy here and not truly knowing what being satisfied in Christ can look like, I get saddened by the way the world makes us feel driven to have to have all those things. I am so sad that we can't be satisfied enough in Christ to let all the gadgets go. I have found myself checking my phone more here than in Tonga, I feel like I